#205 DB – Monteith’s Black

My photo got deleted from my phone. I did NOT have a six-pack.

Name: Black
Brewery: Monteiths Brewing Company (owned by DB Breweries)
Style: Shwarzbier
ABV: 5.2%
Source: CheeseFest

My stepmum had this really cool idea of doing a 0% alcohol beer for February 29th since its kind of a non-day (apologies if it’s your birthday, you poor sod), but things didn’t quite work out and I ended up doing something much less interesting instead.

As a matter of principle I try to avoid buying Monteith’s (or other DB) beers at any cost – to the point where I have bought some very bad beer simply because it was the only alternative. I don’t think I need to explain why – anyone beer nerdy enough to read this blog will be sick of the whole Radler thing by now – but lets just say I think DB are Douche Bags and leave it at that. (And also Dick Brains, and Dumb Bums, and any other witty DB’s you can think of. There are a lot, so have fun with it!)

Occasionally though, I find myself in situations where the beer is free and there’s no other choice. That’s how my ‘beer of the day’ came to be a fifth of a Monteiths Black, drunk from a plastic cup at the Monteiths CheeseFest.

On the nose it was kind of promising – some chocolatey, espresso notes, perhaps a little fruit even. In the mouth it was OK – I got sugary caramel and a little roasty bitterness at the finish, but it was a bit watery, and the flavour seemed to shirk away, unceremoniously, at the finish.

To be honest, this really isn’t a bad beer for the price. I can see why so many Kiwis would include this or others from the Monteiths range in their weekly shop, because it’s cheapish and it does actually have some flavor.

But that’s doesn’t excuse DB for being Dick Bags, Dirt Balls, Ding Bats, etc, so I won’t ever be one of them.

(PS – If you like Monteith’s black but don’t want to give your money to those Donkey Butts, I suggest Cooper’s Stout as a similarly priced, much more delicious and completely non-evil dark beer.)

(PPS – sorry about this awful post. Friday afternoon innit.)

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Published in: on March 2, 2012 at 3:57 pm  Comments (2)  
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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. a Bag of Dicks i an interesting prospect….However I totally agree with your post on the miserable trademarking Doodle Burgers.

  2. If you ever get free DB product again, give me a shout and I’ll give some product so you don’t have a taste DB product again…LOL. Your sink might appreciate DB product being poured into it.


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