#59 Tuatara – APA

Tuatara APA

Name: APA
Brewery: Tuatara (Waikanae, New Zealand)
Style: American Pale Ale
ABV: 5.7%
Source: Brew on Quay

(Because writing the same way every day gets boring.)

Dearest APA,

Do you remember the first night we met? I do.

To be fair, it was only a few weeks ago – the night of the RWC opening as I recall. We were jammed in with the crowds at AndrewAndrew, catching the last rays of sunshine on the last patch of AstroTurf. Some might call it Rugby Mania, but I like to think there was a certain… electricity in the air.

I know it sounds shallow, but it was your clothes that got my attention first. That orange and blue label looked so cool on you. So retro. So American. Of course you looked even better without your clothes… Your body had a healthy, hazy golden glow, your head was strong and creamy.

I wanted to taste you.

But first there was your scent – again, so American. There was grapefruit, sure (but then I say that to all the beers), and a rich, malty body. There was a certain… je ne sais quoi  as well… a hint of grass, perhaps?

When my lips touched yours I knew at once what kind of beer you were. Assertive, with a zest for life, but with your feet firmly planted on the ground. Your citrus side was charming, exciting, but the malt gave you depth and made me feel safe.  You felt smooth and full in my mouth, and I wanted you all at once.

It was only a week or two later that I started hearing the rumours about you. I heard you were skipping town for a year (some say, with Hop Zombie), and that they’ve already bought a new guy in to replace you. “Aotearoa Pale Ale” he’s called – apparently a bit of a hotshot.

You can understand my distress, and that ‘s why I had to have you again last night – to taste you one final time before you left. You didn’t disappoint, but oh it was bittersweet.

I’m writing now to tell you that I’ve decided to move on – maybe check out this new guy and see what all the fuss is about. I hope you’re not hurt, it’s just that a year is a long time to wait. And besides – God knows what you’ll get up to when you’re off with Hop Zombie.

Until next year, farewell my love.

A x

Published in: on October 7, 2011 at 11:59 am  Comments (8)  

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8 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. The greatest review of APA (maybe of all beer) ever. Cheers @beerforayear. We promise to be good while she is gone! Cheers from the team at Tuatara

  2. Loved this post!! Anthropomorphising things is fun.

    I have a bottle of this that my sister brought over and this post just inspired me to chuck it in the fridge. Can’t wait!

  3. That’s just… well, brilliant. So wrong (in the bordering-on-morally-wrong sense) and yet so right (in the what-she-said sense).

  4. Fantastic review for a fantastic beer. I’ve just returned from living in the US for a few years and gained an appreciation for good strong hoppy beers. Wasn’t looking forward to returning home to the week offerings that were available when I left. But have been pleasantly suprised with the quality and strength of NZs craft brew scene. Particularly the ipas on offer. Well done and I look forward to hearing about more good local brews


  5. Love it!


  6. I’m going to miss APA (have a couple bottles stashed in the pantry at home), but looking forward to trying APA (Aotearoa, that is!). Loved this post! 🙂

  7. No

  8. Oops. Meant to say, nice piece. You are right, you cannot write all reviews the same.

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